travel

clearing the phone memory of previous holiday trips makes me realize that i am missing the places i've been before.

kalau berpeluang umrah/haji di mekah dan madinah, jangan disia-siakan peluang beribadat di dalam bangunan masjid untuk membolehkan ibadat dimulakan dengan solat tahiyatul masjid. jika berada di madinah, jangan lupa mengunjungi taman syurga raudhah. jika berada di mekah, cuba rebut peluang berdoa di bawah pancur emas. jika di malaysia kita sentiasa berlengah ke masjid, biasakan diri bergerak sejam lebih awal dari waktu solat untuk merebut tempat hadapan yang selesa.

berjalan, dan banyak berjalan bila berada di tanah suci. buka mata dan lihat persekitaran, gelagat manusia dari segenap pelusuk dunia yang berkumpul dengan niat yang sama. tidak perlu mengasingkan diri untuk sentiasa duduk bersama jemaah dari negeri/negara yang sama. kadangkala, jemaah dari tempat lain lebih mesra walaupun perbezaan bahasa menjadi penghalang untuk berbicara.

jangan lupa bawa ubat yang biasa dengan diri kita untuk berada di tempat orang. ubat batuk/sakit tekak kita mungkin susah didapati di negara orang lalu menyulitkan kita untuk beribadah/travel. jika biasa berbantal kecik, bawalah untuk keselesaan leher sendiri. jika biasa berselimut (fleece blanket), jangan malu untuk mengelakkan diri menggigil kesejukan. tapi comforter tebal janganlah, buat susah saja.

bagi yang biasa travel, mesti dah biasa dengan preparation nak bawak apa semuanya. tapi yang jarang atau first-timer, don't worry. bawa barang sesikit/simple/kurang/minimum mungkin untuk perjalanan yang hanya beberapa hari. a lot more to stuff inside ur bags once reached there and shopping! semakin kurang berat asal beg, semakin banyak advantage. kotak n shopping bags pun berguna. or u can buy new bags there.

paling penting, buka mata dan nikmati perjalanan korang. a journey doesn't have to be perfect either. some mistakes, tertinggal bas, sick, tak cukup baju etc, everything will sure create some good memories later. enjoy and cherish every moments!

mode: belum berkemas for flight esok pagi lagi :(

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stress

seriously?

i will start rambles on my blog for this several weeks/days.

they are just simply making things hard for me like they are the ones innocent and i am not.

keep in mind, i cannot be bought easily and i am not a typical malay girl. i see things mostly from my eyes and does not just hear and false accusations.

if u do not expect me resigning, why does ur body language shows the opposite? why do u always touching ur nose n ears like something is wrong? we do not need to learn om psychology to umderstand about this u know?

i am not a stupid malay girl. i learn a lot from ur hipocracy. and for those who have eyes to see, can definitely see all of that.

so i firmly believe, ur assumption about me is based solely on 1 person. 1 particular person. she can puji me, and she can put me down. that simple. if i am in the bad book, definitely i lost all the privileges. and now i am in the bad book.

i seriously doesn't remember about the bonus. so-called pre-bonus and i don't care either. u've been so biased since forever. and i doubtly confirm who n who to be blamed in all ur previous cases.

now u just want to put all the blames on me. just see when i left and there is no one to do things fast for u. i don't like people to overshadow me. i do all the works but other people get all the credits. that is so wrong.

ps: i don't even bother for u to buy me anything from the company trip or holiday or oversea or whatever. i don't need to know ur stupid reason. there are just nothing i did to satisfy people. i am not a kipas person. i don't talk to impress people to angkat to bodek or whatever and i hate people doing that. that is the politic u're talking about?

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mungkin

sorilah, ni memang topik bosan.

tiba-tibalah. dis kawen thingy become taboo in my family becoz of what i say. well, i asked for it too kan?

sometimes, i do wonder and admire those yang belum kawen2 lagi walaupun body cantik, baik budi pekerti dan berjawatan tinggi.

i do wanna get married too, even it's seems way too impossible.

but honestly, there is one fella that come across in mind. my love at first sight, i just name him as ali.

maybe He need me to change myself to be a better me then we will meet again kot. stop being so desperate n gedik2 n too hopeful for a relationship by then.

ummm...

i better equip myself first. do the things i like. enjoy everything i do. love myself much more.

maybe we will meet again in another coincidence situation. or perhaps a set-up to really get to know each other.

have faith.

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confuse

my worst birthday ever, 28th april 2013.

i know i'm not anak kesayangan. belajar pun tak sampai mana. keja pun main-main. keja bukan glemer mana pun. bukan anak yang dibanggakan. takde boifren di umur 28 tahun.

i guess i have learned enough to not trust guys and relationshit. i have encountered love from young age and met guys from many different backgrounds. and i have learned my lessons on which type of guys that i need/don't like to be my partner.

i am a very feminist type of person. i don't like guys who discriminate girls, the one who lied and do violence. i am very very very scared of this type of guys.

being 28, first in the morning is receiving a wish sms from mom plus the thing of "i think u can find a partner to build up ur own family". it is really heartbreaking and can bring me to tears even by thinking of them. even i cried a lot of this in the office today. i'm just not that strong.

mom's wishes is really obligated to make true. tell me to do anything, i'll do them. tell me to go to any places, i'll go. but tell me to get married, i don't think so. i see alot of guys yang saja nak try the girls, test-market is even worse. ini ke calon2 yang nak dibuat laki? i don't think so.

i once said, kalau mati lebih baik then i'll choose that over marriage. if i suddenly to get any incurable disease, then just let it be. i think it's not worth even to share with someone close. at times like this, a loner like me feels so lonely now.

with nobody to turns to, with no one to talk to. there's just alot more that u don't even know about me. that i kept secret for too long. that i menzalimi diri sendiri to even to get married.

to say that i cannot move on from any previous relationshit? bitch, please. i am way ahead. but what happened in the past have made me this. that i don't think i deserve to be loved.

i feel so small in a large world.

if anybody wanna get married, then go ahead like i care. but don't force me into one. i have suffered for too long that i don't think i can recover. maybe then the right kinda guy can save me, but let's say that in your dreams ah.

i don't believe in fairy tales, nor reality. ottoke?

i'm happy with other people's happiness, but just don't ask me to create one. i can't.

what a complicated ways to be me.

but.

who can i turn to when things get rough and i cannot think? there's just no one. i only have myself and God above. i hope that He is not tired of listening.

siapa tak mau kawen? i have rumbled about this for too long that i can remember. only my past behold me. restrains the current and future me.

ah, that's why i am more into exercising nowadays. just to distract my thoughts and making me tired to sleep. even to watch revenge oso kepenatan.

other people cannot see me sad n stressed. i am the toughest of the tough. only i deserved to be in this kind of situation.

i hope that girls out there can find their other half too. may God bless and u can find your happiness. stop whining but believe.

i don't really see my future. maybe my life won't meet my other half, like tak sempat. i cannot imagine happiness with a partner. like seriously.

guys, stop tricking girls. it is not fun. destroying a girl's life. it is not fun too. toksahla for the sake nak berkenalan bagai then u mengorat sakan, but then there's nothing but hopes. it is not fun and very disturbing.

what i want for my birthday? to happily celebrate with family and friends. but i don't get it that way. infact, this is the birthday that i cried my lungs out and so much. like i used up all my cries quota this time.

i want to go for holidays. i want an ice cream cake. i want new phone, s4 probably. i want new job. i want to get them all by myself and my money see, a guy not always can fit in there. my life has taught me to not too dependable on guys. kena berdikari, laki tak suka perempuan lembik sangat.

guess, guys like that a lot. and they simply won't chase an independent girl like me. that simple.

when the things get tough, and i have no one to talk to. this is the place that i will say my heart out.

posted from Bloggeroid

men

HEAR WHAT OPRAH WINFREY HAD TO SAY ABOUT MEN :

If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away.

If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.

Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be. Slower is better. Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends". A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend.

Don't settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is. Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better. The only person you can control in a relationship is you. Avoid men who have a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently? Always have your own set of friends separate from his. Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up. Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later.

You cannot change a man's behavior. Change comes from within. Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are. Even if he has has more education or in a better job. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less.

Never let a man define who you are. Never borrow someone else's man. If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you. A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you. All men are NOT dogs.

You should not be the one doing all the bending... Compromise is two way street. You need time to heal between relationships. There is nothing cute about baggage... Deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship. You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you. A relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals. Look for someone complimentary...not supplementary.

Dating is fun... Even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right. Make him miss you sometimes... When a man always know where you are, and you're always readily available to him ~ he takes it for granted. Never move into his mother's house. Never co-sign for a man. Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need. Keep him in your radar but get to know others.

Scared of being alone is what makes a lot of women stay in relationships that are abusive or hurtful: Dr. Phil says... You should know that: You're the best thing that could ever happen to anyone and if a man mistreats you, he'll miss out on a good thing. If he was attracted to you in the 1st place, just know that he's not the only one. They're all watching you, so you have a lot of choices. Make the right one. Ladies take care of your own hearts... ❤

bucket-travel-list

ehemmmmm....

i am considering alottttttt to go travel neh!

so kira yang dah masuk list ni:

1- busan, south korea. i wish to go to yonghwa's hometown ni. alah, yang cn blue tu. got exposed via runningman alot plus we got married yongseo. hesh, macam best jew! tapi.... kena blaja korea dulu. wokeyyy??

2- filipina, the island part. maybe not the city part the highlighted area la kot. i choose this lepas terpengaruh dengan si reeney terfaktab dok tuit ada pulau tu aritu. and it is definitely not too costly tau. but i want to go for honeymoon! seriously. ehemmmm... if, i kawen la kot. oh gitu!

3- brunei. maybe? to travel alone punya lah. maybe dis year or next. tengah kira-kira kumpul duit. maybe tak lama pun. maybe macam pegi wiken or samting. nanti gugel!

4- europe trip! jinjja?? yupe! i want to go alone atau berdua or samting like that. i nak naik flight, bas, train, metro, subway. everything! for several countries oso. oleh itu, yang ni haruslahhhh menyimpan duit. dalam 10k perlu dalam tangan! ohoi.

ini yang nak pegi la. yang taknak pegi pun ada jugak dalam list. hoho..

1- krabi, thailand. sebab beberapa kapel yang tak disukai, not just tidak digemari okey.. diorang pi hanimun sini, so memang ai tak berapa minat ah nak pegi sini. obviously not honeymoon place for me. kalau nak pegi sendiri, dipertimbangkan. kalau nak pi ngan kawan2, maybe?

2- indonesia. bali, bandung or anywhere within. not a fancy. itu jela kot. haha..

i'm planning to spread my wings even further! takmo ni dekat2 malaysia je. if in malaysia, that is only jalan2 boleh balik hari pun la. the ultimate goal ialah pi holiday oversea! makanya, pitis pun kena lebih banyak! more to earn, more to save!

oleh itu, new plan is gonna make up in future. haish, dengan no bonus n no naik gaji. that is a bit hard in the biased kampeni okey.

soon!!

posted from Bloggeroid

sa rang?

fake love?

been there, done that.

for several times summore.

not in the mood to search for a lover pun right now.

but then...

vacancy for the heart?

only for those able to commit in a long-term relationship with a serious intention to be a partner-in-crime.

i'm not becoming any younger.

and i'm not here to play.

that. stopped. a long time ago.

all this love thingy is bullshit.

huh.

posted from Bloggeroid